Dear MMA Gods:

Dear MMA Gods:

By Alex Conway

This week the UFC announced that UFC lightweight champ Khabib Nurmagomedov and former champ Conor McGregor will fight at UFC 229 on October 6 in Las Vegas.

If you could allow Conor McGregor to steer clear of any parking garages, busses, Michael Chiesa or Ray Borg, a UFC direct deposit that is too light, alarm clocks that are set for the exact time instead of 45 minutes early on the day of a press conference and maybe if you could allow him, or someone close to him, that would be great.

Also, if you could make sure the Khabib Nurmagomedov is bubble-wrapped for all his practices and has all his meals properly portioned out that would also be fantastic.

This week the UFC also let us know that Nate Diaz is signed on to fight Dustin Poirier at UFC 230 on November 3 in New York at Madison Square Garden. All of us in the MMA hardcore community would like to thank you for this delicious blessing of fighting violence and middle-finger waving theatrics.

But we would also like to remind you that we went along with Conor McGregor’s ridiculous foray into a boxing match with Floyd Mayweather when what we all really wanted was a third fight with Nate Diaz or at the very least for McGregor to defend his title.

We feel you owe us this one and should let it live long enough to see the cage door close. So all that stuff about “F*** the UFC” that Diaz tweeted out as he stormed out of Friday’s press conference, could we get some clarification on that soon?

Please make sure that Dana White isn’t too much of a d*** to his fighters, especially Nate Diaz. We miss him and love him.

We also found out that Georges St-Pierre might have been offered a fight against Anderson Silva. We think that’s a fine fight, but it’s a little past its expiration date. We would be OK if that one didn’t come to fruition. Surely there has to be something more interesting out there for Georges St-Pierre if he were to return?

We would also like to say that we are eagerly anticipating the announcement of the main event for the UFC 230 New York card. For the life of us, we can’t figure out who will headline that event. It can’t be Daniel Cormier and Brock Lesnar, which we would also gladly sacrifice USADA if it meant we could get it, and we don’t think that Ronda Rousey is coming back either.

Most of the other potential title fights don’t quite feel like they have the right New York card feel to them either. Maybe we could get a little insight into how that fight card will play out?

Lastly, we would like to thank you for sending us Sage Northcutt and Derrick Lewis. In a time where pro athletes can’t seem to handle or understand the power of social media, we would like to thank those two individuals for showing us good wholesome and funny tweets are still possible on a regular basis.

Ok, maybe Derrick Lewis doesn’t exactly fall into that category, but damn if he doesn’t make us laugh with his self-deprecating humour and constant pursuit of Ronda Rousey like an MMA version of Pepe Le Pew.

We shall try to write again soon.